April 2018 – Batfort

Month: April 2018 (page 1 of 4)

Dahyun appreciation post

Is this a blog post in praise of one particular member of the K-pop group Twice?

Yes, yes it is.

Dahyun is the kind of girl I wish we had more of in the United States. A celebrity with a really offbeat sense of humor, who is allowed to use her offbeat sense of humor as part of her brand. In fact, Dahyun first gained notoriety by going viral (in Korea). This girl is a literal meme.

(Thank God she signed with JYP, the personality-focused Korean entertainment company, which lets her be herself.)

I mean, in Twice’s recent comeback, where they all played both male and female leads of famous movies, Dahyun not only dressed as the titular assassin-for-hire in Leon: The Professional, but she went all-out with the beard and everything.

This is not an Elle Fanning type who is afraid to get her hands dirty and thinks of her image above all. This is someone who genuinely puts her heart into what she’s doing.

There isn’t enough of that in the world, so Dahyun needs appreciating.

(She even dressed as Leon in a livestage of “What is Love?” even though she could have dressed as her elegant infomercial character.)

And in addition to singing and rapping, she plays the piano.

More Dahyuns, please.

Hostess gifts

2018-04-29 / childlike empress / 0 Comments

When you crash at somebody’s house while traveling, it’s good to say thank you to the host in something more than just gratitude. Most people won’t let you clean their house, although that would be a great idea.

Here are some things that I get for my hosts:

Flowers. Cut for are good. A plant is even better.
Salt. Specialty salts like Hawaiian red salt or flaky sea salt like Maldon.
Wine or premium booze, like bourbon or scotch.

Keep it simple, and practical. If the gift is something out of the ordinary, explain it in the card.

I always look for cards that can double as art.

Note to self: build a better bed

2018-04-28 / childlike empress / 0 Comments

I’m travelling this week, and as such have slept in a number of different beds. Both so far (and there are more to come) are vastly more comfortable than mine. Soft over a firm core, plus linens well-chosen pillows.

My own bed is comfortable, but more spartan. When I bought it, I had very little money (a step up from not much money, but certainly a step down from where I’m at now). I sprang for a mattress cover, but nothing is as soft as these beds.

So, when I return, I’m building a better bed.

Memory (but not too memory) foam mattress pad
Quality pillows
Supple linens

An easier way, perhaps, would be to buy an entirely new bed.

Perhaps, but I’m not going to make the time, money, and effort spent in doing so.

Small upgrades will make a huge difference.

Image of the Week: crossing the (dragon energy) streams edition

2018-04-27 / childlike empress / 0 Comments

This is an image of a phenomenon called “crown shyness,” in which – as you can clearly see from the picture – certain types of trees don’t like to touch other trees.

Much the same as humans, as it turns out.

With all the crossing of the streams that has happened this week, I think a little bit of “consciousness shyness” is in order for myself and probably a lot of other people on the internet.

Take some time to examine what’s inside the contours of my own domain.

I love how crown shyness patterns are highly irregular, yet super integrated.

Maybe that’s what we should all aspire to be.

Crooked souls tryna stay up straight

2018-04-26 / childlike empress / 0 Comments

There was a plant in the hallway of my office. A dieffenbachia.

It took me a while to determine that it was a dieffenbachia because it was one of the saddest plants I have ever seen. One overgrown stalk, drooping listlessly to the side. One lone leaf, trailing off the tip of the stalk. No sunlight, no air. I’m sure it got watered occasionally.

Then the leaf started to wither.

I thought it was going to die.

So I searched online to find out what type of plant it might be. I learned that it might enjoy a little bit of sunlight and occasional, but very deep, waterings. I moved the plant into my office where it can see the sun, and started watering it according to plan.

But the plant was still wilted, and its leaf withered even more.

Then I learned that I could do surgery on the plant to help it grow a new root, so that we could jettison the old stalk and root system while saving the plant. The surgery required wrapping the incision site with moss, which I have in my basement.

But I kept forgetting to bring it.

Then I went out of town for a few days.

When I came back, something had changed: a very tiny new little leaf had started growing.

I was astonished — I thought the plant was dying! I was going to do emergency surgery on it, and I can’t do that when there’s very clearly a new leaf growing. So I left it alone, and watered it according to plan.

Soon, the leaf grew into a tendril, then into a legit piece of plant architecture. It hasn’t unfurled yet, but it’s heading that direction. The stalk, which once drooped over like a Charlie Brown Christmas tree, started to grow straight and tall.

This dieffenbachia is not a proper full-grown confident plant yet, but its on its way.

All because of a location change, some sun, and proper watering.

What once was lost has now been found.

Too many things swimming around in my head

2018-04-25 / childlike empress / 0 Comments

» Sometimes you realize how inadequate you are to face the sheer colossus of reality. There’s so much I want to understand right now, to wrap my head around, but it’s nearly impossible to get a handle on it. A few years ago, I wouldn’t have been able to see what’s in front of me; now I see it and know that I’m much to finite to figure any of it out. Yet I feel compelled to try my best.

» And simultaneously I try to stretch myself in new ways, to develop physical muscles and learn new things and decide on the future and revisit old friendships and forge new ones. The newness, the regrowth, can be overwhelming.

» It’s too warm in my house which makes it difficult to concentrate.

» I find Korean more aesthetically pleasing than Japanese but Japanese-style music videos are 1000x crazier than anything aimed at the Korean market.

» It’s really easy to just look around for someone who will tell you what to do. Resist that impulse. Thinking for yourself is difficult, and it involves risk.

» It’s really difficult to be encouraging to others when you’re feeling rather nihilistic yourself.

» What if I want to be an artisan, not a merchant?

Introverted Sensing

2018-04-24 / childlike empress / 0 Comments

Warning: this is a completely self-indulgent, ninja-level MBTI post.

On the introverted sensing of the INTP:

This stored knowledge is the fuel for the pedantic stereotypes and discursive form of argument (moving goalposts if Ti simply lacks the knowledge) that online debates have become known for. It’s largely impossible for an INTP to ignore their sense data, and they are bound to it in experiential form, over capturing reality as it seems in the present. If the foundation of their argument is based on sound perception data, they are unwaveringly accurate in their evaluations.

Given that Si is rooted in recollection, the INTP habitually refers to and maintains records from the past. These might take the shape of objects, or souvenirs which remind them of general moods at the time. INTP’s might be collectors and even hoarders, as there is no object separate from its value in terms of past significance.

In short: we have a hard time letting go.

For quite some time now I’ve been ruminating on the parallels between my external life and my internal life. The problems that I have in my external life seem to be mirrored, almost exactly, by the problems in my internal life.

To be less abstract about it, take the bit I bolded above. I have long held onto memorabilia from the past, like ticket stubs and other bits and bobs. More inconveniently, I also hang onto papers and notebooks from old courses; there are materials from high school – or possibly even earlier – from my old educational archives. Mostly-Grown Me has figured out how to let go of these physical embodiments of stuff I’ve learned — I’ve purged most of my paper ephemera from grad school. Young Me nearly had panic attacks at the thought of throwing away a paper that had information that I needed to know on it. (Even if that information was readily available elsewhere.)

Sometimes that instinct extends to places that it really shouldn’t go, like taking out the trash. There is no useful information in a bag of trash — and yet.

I also feel like this extends internally somewhat (and no, this isn’t totally the domain of sensing) to my tendency to hold onto ideas, or relationships, or feelings, or memories, or associations long past their due date. Cleaning mental house is sometimes as difficult as cleaning out an old desk. (Although morning journaling has helped with this immensely.)

But now I’m going to take this past the mind and into the body. For a few years, I struggled with Small Intestine Bacterial Overgrowth, which was really Whole Body Bacterial Overgrowth. My body was literally hanging on to bacteria that it obviously didn’t need. (This was aided and abetted by some high powered immune-suppressing drugs.) It took years, plus some natropathic assistance, for my body to relearn how to properly purge unnecessary bacteria. And though the worst of it is over, I’m still learning how to live a “clean” life.

But I’ve always thought it was kind of funny how I had hoarding problems in my living space and hoarding problems in my physical body.

Learning how to let go and clean things out has been instrumental in my upswing in wellbeing over the past few years.

There are probably some lingering clinging emotions that I should deal with, but like any INTP I like to pretend they don’t exist. (Which is probably why they are a problem in the first place!)

No conclusions here, I just found a new conceptual model of the INTP and wanted to flesh out some thoughts I’ve had.

In praise of the k-pop dance practice video

2018-04-23 / childlike empress / 0 Comments

My favorite genre of k-pop videos is the dance practice.

“Why is this?” I can hear you asking. “Why would you watch the practice video when you could watch the polished video?”

Well, my friend, I am glad you asked. There are so many reasons.

Since it’s a practice, everyone’s wearing casual clothes and I don’t get distracted looking at the styling. Since k-pop costumes have a lot going on, it can take a lot of focus to sort out the individual and group dynamics going on in any given stage.
The camera may zoom in and out, but in general it keeps to the same angle, with no cuts. This lets me see the choreography as it was intended by God, nature, and Kasper. I can see the full formation changes that you cannot in the frenetic jumpcuts that plague the live music shows.
Since it’s a dance-focused video, there’s a better chance of watching the group dance full-out. K-pop groups don’t always dance full-out in performances because they have to sing, too, so if you want to truly appreciate their dance abilities, watch the dance practice.

I particularly like EXO-CBX’s “Blooming Day” dance practice, mostly because the choreo is so good. The formations trade off between three sets of three and many variations of the dancers flanking Chen, Baekhyun and Xiumin. The chreo is a mix of legit dancing and jokey dance moves that suit the song and the group.

Unlike some of EXO’s choreography that runs counterpoint to the main melody of the song (see the “Monster” dance practice below), this choreo reinforces all the main sections and rhythms of the song – but it works with the theme.

Another dance practice I particularly enjoy is EXO’s “Monster.” If I’m being honest, I prefer the dance practice to the actual m/v, although I do like the dance performance video as well.

This one is a little more produced, with the heavy backlighting and the camerawork, but it’s still pretty simple. What makes it special is that it lets the choreography shine.

To finish this post off, we’ll turn to something cute: Twice. The “TT” dance practice is how I learned all of their names, so it has a special place in my heart. And if we’re going to go for girlgroup choreography, Twice is one of the better groups. They’re the least self-conscious.

And the “TT” choreography is just as catchy as the song.

A brief timeline of Kanye (and me)

2018-04-22 / childlike empress / 0 Comments

I’ve never really decided how I feel about Kanye West, but I do know that my opinion has changed over the years.

Typically I’m the kind of person who runs in the opposite direction of the “cool” stuff, so when I first heard of Kanye I was primed to dislike him. His superstardom coupled with the fact that I’m a suburban-raised non-black person meant that I never really felt comfortable with the idea of being a “Kanye fan.”

Anyway, after his openness on twitter this weekend, I thought it might be fun to go back to see what I used to think and how it’s evolved over the years.

@celeriac 11 Mar 2009
kanye west wore a canadian tuxedo on american idol tonight. i really hope he isn’t as much of a trendsetter as he thinks he is.

[Little did I know that I myself would don the Canadian tuxedo during much of the winter of 2013.]

@celeriac 20 Apr 2009
you guys, i am listening to kanye west and liking it. what is happening to me.

@celeriac 13 May 2009
today’s playlist: ukraine eurovision 2003 + mcr’s black parade + kanye’s heartless, eclectic? YES, I THINK SO.

@celeriac 14 Sep 2009
RT @KanyeWest YO PATRICK SWAYZE I KNO U JUST DIED AND ALL&IMA LET U FINISH BUT MICHAEL JACKSONS DEATH WAY BY FAR THE BEST ONE DISYEAR

@celeriac 22 Oct 2009
aww, twitter started explaining trending topics. and i thought they just wanted to let me know that kanye west is not dead.

Email 20 Jan 2011
Subject: mikeyway + unicorn
To: A group of friends (this was during the throes of my emo phase)
From: Me

I like a couple of Kanye’s songs, but the I AM THE GREATEST shtick he’s got going on really grates on my nerves, when I don’t think he’s the most hilarious thing ever. Sue me, I’m conflicted.

Blog post 27 Nov 2011
Subject: i am thankful for

» Inside jokes. Like the green ribbon, Gouda, my boyfriend Kanye West and Steinbeck/Hemingway tag team cage wrestling. <3

@celeriac 4 Feb 2013
the new FOB song sound kinda like their cover of a rihanna/kanye collaboration. #shrug #butitsstillcatchy

Email 20 May 2015
Subject: Kanye
To: Me
From: A friend

“I am a pop artist. So my medium is public opinion.”

http://www.thestar.com/entertainment/stargazing_blog/2015/05/kanye-west-gets-an-honorary-doctorate.html

Email 21 Nov 2016
Subject: I am official concerned
To: A friend
From: Me

In other MK Ultra news, they took Kanye: https://www.reddit.com/r/The_Donald/comments/5e8ju8/kanye_forcibly_hospitalised_against_his_will/
[…]
I’m a bit worked up over Kanye and I don’t even LIKE Kanye (but I appreciate him). Okay.

[Yes I went down the MK Ultra rabbit hole for a while. Haven’t we all?]

Email 4 Dec 2016
Subject: a sort of funny
To: Me
From: My mother
a post about Kanye West

So if he’s on his meds, he votes Hillary and if he’s off, he votes Trump. Sounds like America.

To: My mother
From: Me
I’m laughing, but I’m crying

@celeriac 22 Apr 2018
RT @neontaster If you had “Kanye West gets redpilled” in your 2018 predictions bingo card, congratulations.

In conclusion, Kanye West has been growing on me since 2009. WTF I LOVE KANYE NOW.

But for realsies, I’ve been ambivalent about Kanye for a long time. I’ve gradually grown to appreciate him as an artist, as one who is able and willing to be influential, and as a potential free thinker (which he confirmed this weekend).

It is immensely frustrating to be stuck in higher education, which is full of retirement sandtraps and golden chains and lockstep group think. But sometimes I think of someone like Kanye, who is not only his own dog, but who has proven his chops, who is in the middle of that pack of Kardashians AND submerged in the music industry. That makes my higher ed woes, especially as a low-profiler flyer, seem quite pale and insubstantial.

All power to him, and I hope he continues to fight the good fight.